Funny Dracula Puns

How does Dracula keep fit?


Why did Dracula fail his exams?

He was too ghoul for school.

What kind of coffee does Dracula drink?

Why did Dracula never marry?

He wanted to stay a bat-chelor.

What do you call a vampire in a raincoat?


Who does Dracula get letters from?

His fang club.

What’s Dracula’s favorite flavor of ice cream?


Why did Dracula take cold medicine?

To stop his coffin.

Why doesn’t Dracula spend much money at restaurants?

Because he eats necks to nothing.

Why doesn’t Dracula attack chickens?

Their blood is fowl.

What do you call a vampire that can lift up cars?


What did the teacher say to Dracula after he failed his math test?

Can’t you count Dracula?

What city does Dracula Chinese family live in?

Where does Dracula eat his lunch?

At the casketeria.

What do you call a duck with fangs?


Where does Dracula get clean?

In the bat tub.

What do you get if you cross a vampire with a sheep?


Where does Dracula get all his jokes?

From a crypt writer.

What is Dracula’s favorite breakfast cereal?

Ready Neck.

Why couldn’t Dracula’s wife get to sleep?

Because he kept coffin.

What does Dracula drink when he’s on a diet?

Blood light.

What is Transylvania?

Dracula’s terror-tory.

What do you get if you cross Dracula with AI Capone?
A fangster.

What does Dracula say to his victims?

It’s been nice gnawing you.

What does Dracula say when introduced to someone?

Hello, pleased to eat you.

Why did the teacher send Dracula jr. home?

Because he was coffin too much.

What is Dracula’s favorite dance?

The fang-dango.

What do you get if you cross Dracula with Sir Lancelot?

A bite in shining armour.

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